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Smoke and twitches

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Fire and cancer recurrences draw similar fears

By Kay Kerbyson

It can’t happen again! Not so soon. I just don’t know if I have the strength to go through this again.
If you were living in Los Alamos in 2001, you’ll now know what every cancer survivor goes through time and time again when there is a chance that their cancer is back.
When the town was in danger of being devastated by fire again recently, you didn’t have to be a cancer survivor to understand the fear of recurrence.
Whether it’s a high tumor marker, or a spot on a CAT scan, the fear can be debilitating and exhausting.
Flashbacks, anxiety, not being able to concentrate, heart constantly racing. Sound familiar? Welcome to our world.
As a cancer survivor there are many bumps in the road. If you’ve been following my journey at all, you’ll know that cancer survivors don’t finish treatment and skip off happily into the sunset.
There are the side-effects of treatment or surgery, the fatigue, the insecurity.
But whatever the bump, what binds us all together is the fear of our cancer coming back, of having to go through chemo again, of losing our hair again, but most of all that the chemo or radiation won’t work next time.


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